The Longest Week of Work

So I have to admit, as much as I would like to be focusing on all things date related, I’m definitely having a much more difficult time this week with so much over time at work. Planning dates is not easy, which is exactly why I've set out to make it easier for everyone else. I have put in about 60 hours at work this week. Something I never thought I would do...ever! And the fact that I have now found myself in this position, I am realizing just how much I hate money! Sure, it is nice to have nice things, but I would much rather do nice things.

Date #5

The next couple of weeks will probably have pretty basic posts. Overtime is killing me, and I just don't have the mental stamina to put much more into it right now. So sorry for that.

Moving Targets

One of the most difficult parts about my work, software development, is making a plan to have something completed by a specific date, then learning that if you stay on your current course, you’re going to miss your mark entirely.  It is for that very reason that I’m having to put in extra hours this week.

Planning: Give a Little

Christmas is my favorite!

I love the snow, I love the lights, I even love the cold!...and I love that gingerbread house!  

This time of year has a natural ability to bring people closer together...which likely has something to do with the cold. Sometimes I get desires to go out and sing carols on a busy corner. Or go volunteer my time at a homeless shelter.

Lessons From November

So I’m halfway through Phase 1, and I must say that I am pleased with the results so far.  My wife and I are growing closer and communication has been opening up as well.  I am impressed with how quickly I am noticing a difference.

While my writing and blogging skills are likely still in need of lots of work, I am noticing some improvement there as well. Hopefully you are too.

Post-Op: Home For Christmas

Based on some feedback, which I suspected anyway, I've decided to forego telling post-ops in story format.  As was mentioned, the story just isn't interesting enough to be entertaining.  Not to mention how much I was struggling to both provide details that may or may not have existed and keep from running too long.  Strangely, the latter was the bigger problem.  Don’t worry, if there is anyone who actually liked the stories, once I am comfortable enough to start sharing stories from my past, those should fill that void.

Traces of Tryptophan

So I opened up my posting schedule to find that I had failed to assign a topic to today’s post. I've spent some time trying to think of a few things to post on without having to rearrange the rest of my schedule, but the truth on the matter is that all of my thoughts so far sound like more work than I’m willing to give right now.  This is mostly due to the fact that I have been reveling in my time off over the weekend.   A lazy attitude augmented by the fact that I start overtime hours at work tomorrow.  While I may not be as busy as most mothers out there, it doesn't mean I have to be excited about a packed schedule.

Worst First Date Ideas

I have been putting this post off for a few weeks now, but if I keep putting it off, it will no longer be relevant.  It’s probably already past that point though.  During the first week of planning, I compiled what I thought were the best ideas for first dates.  That process led me to think of a few bad first date ideas.  Just like good first date ideas, there are plenty of resources out there, ready to tell you which ideas are simply horrible.

Date #4

Well there is no question that I’m lazier when I have time off of work. Maybe I ate too much turkey and I'm still feeling its effects! All I know is that I often get less done on my days off than I do during my after work hours.  Funny how that works.  Anyway, here is this week’s date plan…

Holiday Trumps Planned Post

I had prepared a big post for today before I realized that it was totally inappropriate for the holiday.  

The Princess and I are out visiting family now, and I don’t have a good backup plan.  So I’ll have to wish you all a happy Thanksgiving and prepare better for next year. Meanwhile, check out Google's doodle...

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!

Staying Motivated

Ah yes! That moment when everything starts to get too busy to handle. When you've gone weeks without a solid break and have to add one more thing to your to-do list.  How will you ever get through it this time?

I have come to that point.  That point when I start asking myself if my efforts are worth it.  Oh sure, from your perspective I have only been keeping this blog for a few weeks.  Not quite even a month. And here I am, debating if it even matters.  

More Commitment

Last week, I talked about taking a bigger step towards “full-evening” dates.  That first step was an effort to make the date last just a little bit longer.  One thing that has been becoming slightly awkward is the fact that I've still been making dinner on our date nights, only dinner isn't technically part of the date.  I touched on this a little bit yesterday in my Post-Op.

Post-Op: New Heights

This date will be difficult to do in story mode, so bare with me and please feel free to offer any advice (it appears that my pleas for caution may be discouraging any comments at all...so go ahead and critique away)! The truth is, it really wasn't all that exciting in terms of a “story.”  So I’ll just give you the details for those who are interested.

When Should We Meet? (Date Start Times)

It seems that most dates happen in the early evening hours.  We get home from work, we get ready to go out, we go out to eat at a good dinner “hour,” and then we move one to some activity.  But is that really the best way to do it during the first few dates with someone?  Going out in the evening can be a risky experience in many places and situations.  Not to mention how difficult it can be in families to find babysitters that are willing to spend their weekend, or even their weeknight evenings taking care of a few kids.  When you are able to find someone, are you truly able to trust them and spend the evening relaxed, without fear that “something will go wrong?”

Accepting Flaws

There’s been a lot of hype going around concerning the petition to provide an “Opt-in” selection to a default ban on internet porn.  This, of course, is meant to be sponsored by the government.  I wanted to express my own thoughts on the petition because I was increasingly disappointed to see so many of my fellows supporting it.  At the same time, I wanted to keep it relevant to this blog and dating.  So I will forego my rantings and stick to a single point.  However, if you are interested in seeing a great source that outlines many reasons why it is a bad idea, check out this post by Connor Boyack.

Date #3

The details of this plan are much shorter.  Everything will be focused on the actual activity.  It is probably worth noting, however, that I put a little more effort into the invitation this time.  Since the date was to go climbing, I placed a written invitation on the ceiling at the highest section of the staircase.  I thought she would have needed to get the ladder out to reach it, but she just knocked it down with a broom stick.  It was super cheesy, but remember, cheese is welcomed in a relationship!

Week 3 Progress

I keep thinking I need to make my posts more interesting, but then I remember that I’m not ready to go into full promotion yet.  I just get so excited when I start seeing lots of page views.

So for those of you reading today, I’ll warn you before hand that there is nothing real exciting in today’s post.

Longer Commitment

So far, things have been going well, but these short dates are already starting to become, well, boring.  I know I don’t want to get ahead of myself and burn out, but I can feel myself wishing I was farther into this than I am.  For now, I’ll have to be content with my little steps and hope that I don’t bore everyone away.

Post-Op (Part 2): Homecoming

Aaron tried to keep his cool as he weaved between the lanes of traffic.  He knew the effort was futile, but doing so made him feel like he was making up for time.  Having gone into work earlier, he should have left a half hour ago, but being such a creature of habit, he had forgotten to leave work early.  He knew he would be cutting it close now because of it.

Post-Op (Part 1): Out of This World

Seeing as how I intend to improve my writing skills, I’ll be using the post-ops as my “story practice” posts.  Chances are the result will be silly and less than stellar, especially since I’ll be referring to myself in the third person.  But hopefully it will get better as I get more practice, and you’ll all forget that I’m the one producing the words.

So to start off, I would like to introduce you to myself, Aaron the Speaker (our protagonist) and Anastasia the Princess (Aaron’s lover).  

Also, I’m starting with Friday’s date because it was the less significant of the two, and I want to give more attention to Thursday’s...something I can’t do right now because I need to get some sleep.  So here’s Friday.

The Short Date

I've mentioned a few times before that it is important to keep first dates short, but what exactly does that mean?  Does that mean you should plan on being home early in the evening?  Or does it mean that your date should only last for a specific amount of time?  Or is it both?

I don’t think it should be either.  If you are planning a date that is clearly meant to carry over through the night, then you might not be able to get your date home before the next morning.  Or you might actually be planning an activity that requires your presence for a longer time than your specific threshold.  

So let’s define this a little better...

Taking a Breather

I don’t want to get into any habits, but I’m going to have to take another breather today.  This week has been pretty hectic with two dates and some late nights.  Our hectic schedule of Homecoming on Thursday and then our, albeit short, date last night coupled with our regular activities has led to a little bit of a neglect for the rest of the family.  

Date #2

This week I've decided to cheat a little bit and break some of my own rules regarding what makes a good first (early) date.  This was due strictly to the fact that my wife asked me out this week.  We just went out last night (which I’ll tell you all about in the “Post-op”) so it hasn't left me with a lot of time to fit in another one in the same week.  Granted, her date counts toward the goals for this phase, so long as I still plan a date for the week.  And of course, if I’m gonna make a plan, you better believe I’m gonna follow through!  So here’s tonight’s plan (you may notice a lot of similarities to Date #1):

She Asked Me

When I started this week, I thought I was ready for it.  After just a short time at work on Monday, I realized I was no longer ready.  The day was agonizingly long, but I got through it and stumbled my way home where I lazily went about the rest of my duties.  

When Tuesday hit, I was determined to make it a better day.  Most of that energy went into being productive at work.  So while I was much more productive during my work hours, by time I got home, that energy was gone again.  

Falling Behind

I admit that I'm already a little bit behind this week.  Last weekend was a little rough as far as posts go so I didn't spend the time planning the next date like I should have.  To top things off, this week will be a little more difficult since the date will have to be on Friday instead of Saturday.  So that's one less day for planning.

Phase 1 Progress: Pace Yourself

After a successful first round, there is a large temptation to start sprinting.  It has taken many face plants and painful exhaustions for me to learn the valuable lesson of PACING YOURSELF!  We all make the mistake.

Post-Op: Ice Breaker

When you go on a “first date” with your spouse, how exactly are you supposed to act?  Is anything okay?  Or should you treat each other like you would if you had just met?  It’s an interesting dilemma.

Make a Plan

Do you ever have those days when you are supposed to make dinner and you don’t know what to make?

Stepping Back

I was moving a little slower yesterday and didn't get around to pre-writing this post, so sorry it's late.  I realized that there is really no reason why I have to stick to a schedule on when each post comes out.  But the biggest motivator is perhaps the fact that I have been concerning myself more with viewers than I originally intended.  So after yesterday’s unshared, unviewed post, I conceded that this blog really is more about me than anyone else.  And I’m fine with that.  Takes off a lot of pressure, actually.

Date #1

For anyone who is ready to get started on the first date, here it is!

First Date Ideas (With Guidelines)

There is no shortage of advice on what a first date should or shouldn't be.  Add to that the complexity of it being the first date within an established relationship, and you’ll get all kinds of variations.  However, I believe that there are only a few truly acceptable “first dates” if you intend to be together for a long time (or if you already have been together for a long time).

Keep it Simple

As I've been thinking about the best “kick-off” date, I've been all through the ringer on what is appropriate and what will be a quick trip to a burn-out.  I started with the most laid back, easy dates I could think of.  Any guesses?

Phase 1: Commitment

There are so many things to be said about “commitment” regarding relationships that it would be silly to approach them all in a single post.  When it comes to the single act of dating, however, the most importing thing to know is that dating lives and dies with commitment.

Post-Op: First Attempts

As described in my first post, starting is hard.  I had actually anticipated starting clear back in September of this year.  I even had a few dates planned out, but one excuse after another kept telling me why it was best to wait one more week.

How to Ask Out Your Partner

When the relationship standard becomes “pursuing personal interests” on the weekend evenings, or even the weekday evenings, how do you change that behavior?

In my attempts to start this blog over a month ago, I kept running into this single problem.  At the time, I was trying to keep my project a secret which augmented the problem.  Any sway from the “norm” becomes suspicious, for better or worse.  This would not have otherwise been a problem if I was not concerned about keeping the first few dates simple and low-key.  

The Long-Term Dating Guide

Changes in habits never come about without a plan.  I've already described the basics of my overall plan, but as we know, the devil is in the details.  In order for a plan to succeed, it needs to be detailed.  So to recap, here are the basics:

Starting Sucks

Let’s get one thing cleared up right from the get go…

I suck!

I suck at blogging.

I suck at writing.

I suck at dating.

I suck at my marriage.